Jul 122026
 

So the most useless plonker in the House of Commons, Nigel Fartrage has thrown his toys out of his pram and resigned as an MP. Not because he’s fed up with all the work involved (he doesn’t do much work at all – just search for his attendance record), but because he’s pissing himself at the thought of the standards commission investigations coming to the conclusion that he should be suspended as an MP for the rest of his life as a corrupt fucker.

Fartrage’s plan is that the folk of Clapton will re-elect him to override the decision of the standards commission; which it won’t do. The investigation is currently suspended because he has resigned and the Chancellor of the Exchequer has accepted his resignation and appointed him the Steward of the Manor of Northstead (a ridiculous legal fiction as MPs aren’t allowed to resign unless they are appointed to certain posts under the Crown).

The fun thing is that every single mainstream political party have refused to put up candidates to oppose Farage leaving just two joke candidates – Farage himself and Count Binface. This has left the Reform PLC party – who have somehow deluded themselves that Farage isn’t a joke candidate but a serious one, in a panic and have resorted to claiming that Count Binface is really an establishment figure.

Which of course is laughable, and says more about Reform PLC’s level of panic than anything else.

Clapton deserves a real MP, but if their only choice is a joke one, Count Binface is a clear winner.

Flying
Jul 132019
 

This question popped on Twitter just now; I’m not sure the question was a serious one, but as it happens I can answer the question as if it were serious. I’ve been running relatively small mail servers for nearly 30 years, so do know a litle bit about it.

This of course does not cover lots of “bolt ons” to email such as SPF, DKIM, DMARC, and that’s just the simple stuff.

To keep things relatively sane, I’m going to gloss over an awful lot of details – for example, there are all sorts of ways of composing and sending emails, but I will assume you’re using some sort of web interface such as Google Mail.

So you compose an email with an interesting picture or two, and click “Send”.

Hang on a bit! You also did some technical stuff when you entered an email address into the “To” field (if you just enter someone’s name, something somewhere is changing that to an email address) and possibly something summarising the email (or trying to get attention) into the “Subject” field.

Headers

Those two headers you have filled in – ‘To’ and ‘Subject’ – are just two of a whole collection of headers that are usually invisible. They are invisible because your mail client is hiding them from you; for good reasons as they’re almost always an unnecessary distraction.

But when you have to diagnose an email problem, seeing the full set of raw headers is kind of essential even if it is dead simple (for the relatively technically sophisticated) to forge headers.

For example, if you set up a dedicated mail client rather than use your mail provider’s web-based mail client, you will have to fill out your own email address (to go into the “From” field). You can fill anything you like into that field although you are unlikely to get a reply

Email Addresses

If you fiddle with your mail client enough, you will realise that the “To” field can be changed to a “Cc” field or a “BCc” field. All three take email addresses, and can be used to send an email to someone but they operate in very slightly different ways.

The “To” header is for the main audience of a message.

The “Cc” header is for an audience who should also see the message, but perhaps don’t need to take any action based on the email.

The “Bcc” header is a bit special because it isn’t added to the raw mail message as a header, but is instead used to compose the envelope listing who should receive the email. If you need (or should) keep the list of people receiving an email secret, or just want to avoid an inconveniently long header for people to read then use the “Bcc” header.

Although your mail client may hide the details, email addresses look like :-

  1. some-name@example.com (a “pure” email address)
  2. “Some Name <some-name@example.com” (as normally formatted)

The Message Submission Server

So you click on “send”. What happens then?

The first thing that happens is that your mail client converts your email (attachments, rich formatting, etc.) into plain text which is why a file attachment just under your ISP’s limit on mail sizes can exceed that maximum.

To the top of that plain text version of your message, your mail client attaches some headers (again in plain text). In addition your mail client will prepare an “invisible” envelope independent of the headers – it contains just the address(es) you want to send to, and your own address.

Finally the mail client is ready to talk to the “mail submission server”. It will login (usually) with your credentials, and sends the message to the server using the “Simple Mail Transport Protocol” (SMTP).

The mail server adds your message to a queue and before it says to your mail client “Okay, I have it”, it will make sure that the message is safe on disk. Mail servers go to a lot of effort to make sure your messages don’t get “dropped on the floor” even when the operating system they are running on crashes.

The Journey

After you have submitted a mail message to the message submission server, the message is held in a queue. This is significant because email is a store and forward messaging solution, so every server your message journeys through will make sure it is stored on disk before saying to the server sending the message “Yep. Got it.”.

In theory this should mean that messages never get lost “in the system” (although practice is often different to theory). The store and forward style of architecture suits the era that email is from – back in the 1970s when email could (and did) traverse many different kinds of network rather than “the Internet” that we have today.

What does that mean today? Amongst other things, it means that whilst you may think that your message only visits two mail servers – the one belonging to your ISP and the one belonging to the recipient’s ISP – and that is certainly a valid architecture for very small organisations.

But it does not work so well for larger organisations that may handle millions, or hundreds of millions of message a day. Summing up a large architecture without actually seeing an architecture diagram for every single ISP and large organisation on the Internet is going to be a bit hit and miss, but I’ll give it a go.

Your message submission server will probably simply hand your message off to a server responsible for sending email messages across the Internet. If it cannot send to the recipient’s receiving mail server on the first run through the queue, it may well just hand the message off to a “slow message server” (processing large queues is a bit of a drag).

In either case, the recipient’s server will accept the message and then hand it over to a “mailbox server” that the recipient will connect to.

And the journey is over. At every stage, reliability is favoured over speed.

How do servers send your message to each other? Using that SMTP standard I mentioned earlier.

Speed

The speed of email is a good topic to cover here. Speed is not what email is about in the same way that the postal service for physical letters is not about speed. It’s about reliability

Your messages may be readable by the recipient within 5 minutes 99 times out of 100, but that 1 time may take a day or two. That’s just the way that email works – if you want instant messaging, use an instant messaging client.

Security

At no point have I mentioned encryption, and that is intentional. At no point is encryption required; email was designed in an era when computers were far slower and encryption was expensive (even though it was far weaker).

At every point, servers are trusting that the senders are not lying and the original sender is trusting that nobody is snooping on their emails.

To correct that there are a whole bunch of optional add-ons to the email standard to deal with that. But that is a story for another day.

End of the Pier
Jul 142018
 

Liam Fox has claimed that Trump protesters have “embarassed” themselves by protesting Trump’s visit to the UK. He claims that we have a tradition of being polite to guests (at least until they throw up on the carpet, piss in the wine, and try to have sex with the host).

Well, I didn’t invite that jumped up rancid little toad who is Putin’s lickspittle and quite possibly the closest thing we’ve seen to a major free world leader being a Nazi. So I am under no obligation to be polite to the bankrupt crook.

Besides which, with his unreasonable and unhinged attack on NATO, Trump has been pissing in the wine, so it would not be unreasonable to slam the door in his face. Of course I’m not being “diplomatic” but I’m not a politician so I’m not being paid to be polite to the kind of person resembling that which you instinctively scrape off your shoe.

To USians who might feel a bit insulted by how their president is being treated; well if you did your job properly and didn’t elect someone with the brains of a pea-sized petrified panda turd who separates children and puts them in concentration camps then we might treat them with a bit more respect.

Apr 052016
 

During a recently on-line rant about anti-abortion terrorists, I happened to trip over some statistics on the rate of mortality during childbirth (the “Maternity Mortality Rate”) from the WHO. And being the kind of person that statistics interest, I spent some time looking into them; indeed I got so interested I transcribed some of the raw figures to generate a pretty graph :-

mmr2

This obviously excludes many countries – what we could call the developing countries. The countries included (which you’ll have to peer closely in order to see – sorry about that) are all rich. At least relatively speaking.

Just look at the USA! Down with the also-rans amongst what could be called the relatively dysfunctional countries at the fringes of being considered “developed”. Now you could argue that there is something special about the reason why the USA doesn’t have a single-digit MMR like the overwhelming majority of developed countries. I can think of a few possibilities myself :-

  1. Perhaps the USA is the only country in the world to tell the truth about it’s actual MMR and all the other countries are lying. Perhaps. I am not going to argue there isn’t a bit of shady practices going on with the figures in some cases, but these figures are produced by statisticians and as an overall group statisticians don’t like lying about numbers. Yes there is the old saw about “lies, dammed lies, and statistics”, but the source of that distrust is the twisting that politicians apply to statistics to support their lies.
  2. Perhaps the USA didn’t read the instructions from the WHO properly about what kind of deaths to include in their returns and they’re including deaths that other countries wouldn’t include. But whilst I’ve not read the instructions from the WHO about this, I have read other instructions on statistics and they usually go into excruciating detail about what should and should not be included. It’s possible that the USA handed this little job over to a complete dumb-arse, but it doesn’t seem very likely.
  3. The WHO is anti-American and decided to inflate the figures. This is just laughable – the WHO isn’t going to risk getting called out by doing something so obvious even if it really was anti-American.

Sometimes the most obvious reason is the real reason – and here the most obvious reason is that the US health care system sucks.

There is additional evidence to show that – the WHO figures cover years other that 2013, and the US figures are consistently bad and getting worse.

But how can this be? The USA is one of the wealthiest countries in the world that spends a ridiculous percentage of it’s annual GDP on health care. It also produces many healthcare innovations and undoubtedly has improved maternal care at some point with some new technique. The really rather obvious (although it really needs to be tested) is that healthcare in the USA is divided into three.

There are those who have full insurance, and this group probably gets pretty good healthcare.

There are those who are covered by government schemes and this group probably gets reasonable healthcare.

And there are those who fall between the cracks – they’re not covered for various reasons – and their care is abysmal and probably limited to emergency care only. Which can sometimes be too late.

But when you come down to it, if you are pregnant it may be worth avoiding the USA until you’ve given birth. And if you’re already in the USA, it may be worth thinking about a long break somewhere where they have a healthcare system that doesn’t suck.